Mortijingle, Lord of Death and Humor
as found in the In Nomine world

Mortijingle is neither Demon Prince nor Archangel, nor, precisely, among the old Gods Uriel went after. No, Mortijingle by his very nature is something unique and kind of silly.

In the War, he meddles little, and mostly just to point out how funny the whole thing is. However, he can take Servitors, from, of course, either side, and can grant them Attunements of His own. One absolute gift any Servitor of Mortijingle gains is His personal protection against any retribution they may incur for making fun of another Superior. It's just something He does.

Followers of Mortijingle regain Essence at 7:30ish, or 2:37:15 sharp on alternate Thursdays. Whether those are AM or PM doesn't change from when they got it before. They gain Dissonance for interfering in a natural death (eg. one that's part of the proper Symphony), or for making a joke that really falls flat. Note that since any Servitor of Mortijingle must be an Outcast or Renegade, many have some form of Discord.

Popular suggestions are: Amusing Stigmata (a bleeding "KICK ME" across the back, say); Vestigium (clown nose? - it won't honk unless it's really a Numinous Corpus/1 instead); Vulnerable (really boring things, like the average college thesis); and a new Ethereal Discord - Amused (must make a Will roll minus the Discord level to take something seriously).

Choir Attunements:
A Seraph of Mortijingle can use his Resonance to determine, with an automatic check digit of 6, if a joke is Truly funny, or if it's just another juvenile sniggering at a natural body function.

A Cherub of Mortijingle can Attune themselves to a particular joke, and then tell it over and over and over again and think it's funny -every single time.- ("Knock Knock"...)

Ofanim of Mortijingle can use their Resonance to show up in the Wrong Place at the Wrong Time.

Elohim of Mortijingle may laugh freely without generating Dissonance, as they understand that the universe IS, objectively, a riot.

Malakim of Mortijingle would, if he ever found one that'd relax enough, be able to spend 2 Essence to turn a Rubber Chicken into a deadly weapon.

Kyriotates of Mortijingle are just plain weird.

and a Mercurian of Mortijingle can spot who the funniest person in a group is, without having to roll.

Oh, and Grigori of Mortijingle can..oh, hey, you're not cleared for that.

Band Attunements:
A Balseraph of Mortijingle can lie like a rug. (No, really; they get down on the floor and think carpet thoughts, and if their Resonance roll succeeds, everyone will think they're a rug. Rough on the back, but..)

The Djinn of Mortijingle can make anyone they're attuned to drunk with a Resonance roll, though it can be resisted by the subject's Will.

Calabim of Mortijingle can focus their Resonance into a giftwrapped box instead of directly at a target; if successful, the box does NOT break apart, but instead contains the destructive energy to unleash at the next person who opens it. (Surprise! Jokey Smurf is a Calabim!)

Habbalah of Mortijingle can make someone laugh their head off. Literally. When they've honestly made someone laugh, they can invoke their Resonance to inflict further Laughter on the victim; if it succeeds, and the target fails a Will roll (plus their Corporeal Forces), their head falls off. This can be inconvenient, but if someone picks it up and puts it back right away, they'll be okay...except for having the hiccups.

The Lilim of Mortijingle, perhaps among His most common Servitors, have the powerful ability to pass Geas. More than just trading Geasa other people owe her, she can force a Geas she's taken upon herself onto someone else. It requires a Will roll minus the Level of the Geas, and they get to resist with their own Will as well. If she fails (not succeeds and is resisted), the Geas increases one Level. If she succeeds and is resisted, however, it goes down one Level. (The one restriction to this, however, is that Geases owed to Lilith herself, including the first 9 for a Free Lilim, cannot be Passed. Hey, Lilith's a cute redhead - Mortijingle likes her.)

A Sheddite of Mortijingle can possess novelty items as well as people. Chattering teeth, whoopie cushions, etc. Not for very long, unfortunately, as they're kind of hard to corrupt.

And an Impudite of Mortijingle has a rapier wit - by delivering a witty comeback, they can cause Mind Hits of damage equal to their Ethereal Forces. The player has to actually come up with the line, though.

Servitor Attunements:

Spoonerism - the Celestial can spend 1 Essence and say, "Like, gag you with a spoon, totally." A spoon will appear in the target's throat, causing them to choke. They must make an Agility roll; if they fail with a Check Digit of 5, they'll be seriously hurt and unable to speak until they get medical attention or Healing; a 6 is fatal. (Servitors of Haagenti just swallow.)

Distinctions:

Night of Puns: A Servitor of this rank can go up to ten hours straight making puns about fish, Shakespeare, electronics, you name it.

Cap-tain: A Cap-tain of Mortijingle can manifest any kind of funny hat, at will; he can wear a cook's hat, a pirate hat, a jaunty beret..whatever.

Master of Bait: The highest ranked Servitors of Mortijingle can taunt an opponent into doing foolish things, like charging over a pit that doesn't, per se, have what you might call a bridge.

Basic Rites:

To remain silent, anything you say can and will be used against you by Dominic. To an attorney; if you can't afford one, well, shucks. To bare arms - hey, short sleeves are O.K. by us.


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j n m ( m n j )
"Any reason to kill them?" -- Prince Vinnie regarding peasants.
"They're revolting and can't dance." -- Princess Krrsed.